I have spent the last several days sifting through bills, credit card information, bank statements and many more paperwork items trying to get a sense of what my monthly budget will look like. You see, I was spoiled with a capital S...Steve took care of everything when it came to finances. Ok so it was nice not to have to worry about keeping up with all of the bills and paying them on time, but truly I wish I would have sat down with him at some point to see how each bill was paid. I can't tell you how many calls I have made to see when the money will be drawn from the account.
So my advice to you whether you pay the bills or you depend on someone else to pay the bills, sit down and talk about it and create a list of when the bills are due, how they are paid (automatic bank draft, credit card, or the old fashion way), and any usernames and passwords you may use. This would have saved me much time and heartache. The only company that truly gave me any grief was Sprint, and how ironic is that because it is the company he used to work for some time ago. You see when they asked me for his childhood friend, I struck out. It wasn't that I couldn't name childhood friends, I just couldn't name the right childhood friend. Their solution...take a death certificate to the nearest store with photo id so they could help me. Just what every grieving widow wants to do with her time... But I must say the people at the Sprint store were fabulous...so much so I called the manager to tell him.
Never in a million years did I think I would be a widow at 39 and have to learn about finances the hard way. I had the best teacher of finances for 16 years and I didn't take advantage of that, and I regret that missed opportunity. God gives us all strengths and weaknesses and He wants us to learn from those around us, and I truly blew it on this one...there was so much to learn from Steve, but I let my pride get in the way. I didn't want to have to admit that I didn't understand much of what he was talking about when it came to finances. How stupid and crazy is that? As he truly was one of THE most patient people I have ever known. I vow to learn from those around me and ask questions when I don't understand because you never know when you are going to need that information. God truly wants us to learn from each other and share that knowledge with those around us. So what can I learn from you?
You can learn about what a great teacher you are to me! Living so far from you all, I didn't know Steve as well as I wish I could have. What I did know about Steve was that he was one of the good ones. I know this because he let us all sit around and chat while he watched your kids at the reunion. I'm married to one of the good ones too.
ReplyDeleteEver since the accident I have had the same thought about Brian and I's bills. He's our finance guy and tonight we will sit down and I too will learn how to pay the bills.
Steve paid us a visit last night on the drums. The kids and I danced (in the house) to it and I thought about you guys a lot!! Love, kisses and prayers from Texas!
You can learn that through your blog you are helping so many people. What a strong person you are and you are not alone when it comes to letting our spouse do things (like pay the bills, ect.....) and not knowing how they do it. Thanks for your awesome advice. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree more... You're teaching all of us Melissa. I'm one of the lucky ones because my Wife Wendy is one of the good ones too. She's an Accountant by trade and I honestly HATE all the bills and numbers stuff. She's great at it and thus she spoils me, but you're right. I need to sit down with her and learn it all as well.
ReplyDeleteYou and Steve were the perfect TEAM and often times we let other things get in the way. You told me on the phone "Cherish Wendy" and we're all learning from you just how important it is to cherish your Wife/Husband and the family. I like to think of myself as one of the good ones too but I promised myself after the accident to find time, make time, take pictures, etc. Your blog is teaching all of us Melissa... Call us if you need anything... Thoughts and prayers from all of us. Chris, Wendy, Carissa, & Tyler
I think I need to sit Allen down and teach him how to pay the bills. Ha! We do take things for granted. God Bless!
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